Maggie's Farm

Well, we're in Day Two of: Gee I miss Bird Dog, and who is this feckless replacement serving up links in his absence? I admit I can't hold a candle to Bird Dog's link output. He reads the whole internet every day, just looking for links for you. Interestingly, he prints the entire internet out on a tractor-feed printer before he reads it. He likes his stories to alternate between white and light green, I guess. I don't know how he does it. I can't manage to read the whole internet every day. My lips get real tired.

For all the Maggie's Farm faithful, I offer that snapshot of Bird Dog relaxing at the day spa while he's away on sabbatical. I hope it tides you over until he returns. I don't want you to get the wrong idea about his reading material, however. He assured me that he was just checking the spelling and grammar for a friend. He's wearing his NSA-proof reading faceguard, of course. He doesn't want the boys at Foggy Bottom, the FBI, the NSA, or Mika Brzkini, er, Brzerker, er, Bazouki, or what ever her name is, knowing what he's thinking while he's reading. Speaking of Mika, I hear she has a tight face and a foggy bottom, too. Normally, Bird Dog wears a tin-foil homburg when he reads instead of the faceguard. Unfortunately, he used the tin foil for cooking during the pig roast, and had to go with his backup. 

Anyway, here are the links that Bird Dog would have offered, if he was on duty, and slightly deranged:

New York Times employees stage walkout over staff cuts

The protest, dubbed a 3 p.m. “collective coffee break” by the Guild, began with workers exiting the Times’ Renzo Piano-designed headquarters on Eighth Avenue through a door on 40th Street. The protesters then walked to Eighth Avenue, up to 41st Street and finished the walkout by entering through doors on 41st Street.

I assume that at 3 PM, the New York Times workers have just woken up from sleeping at their desks, and are fresh and ready to not work with vigor.

Why Did Greenland’s Vikings Vanish?

But over the last decade a radically different picture of Viking life in Greenland has started to emerge from the remains of the old settlements, and it has received scant coverage outside of academia. “It’s a good thing they can’t make you give your PhD back once you’ve got it,” McGovern jokes. He and the small community of scholars who study the Norse experience in Greenland no longer believe that the Vikings were ever so numerous, or heedlessly despoiled their new home, or failed to adapt when confronted with challenges that threatened them with annihilation.

Conjecture and evidence of Norsemen in the Americas and the North Atlantic keeps piling up, but there's one constant: Jared Diamond is an idiot.

Ancient Viking sword discovered in pagan boat grave in Iceland

A Viking sword from the 9th or 10th century was discovered in pagan boat grave at Dysnes in Eyjafjörður, North Iceland. It had metal hilts and some organic material such as leather, which has broken down. Boat grave is a burial in which a boat is used either as a container for the dead and the grave goods, or as a part of the grave goods itself. This was common among Vikings but didn’t seem to catch on in Iceland, only around 10 graves of this kind have been found here.

Has anyone asked Jared Diamond to be wrong about this discovery yet?

Blue Apron May Need to Raise More Money Soon After Shrunken IPO

Less than 24 hours after collecting $300 million in its initial public offering, Blue Apron Holdings Inc. faces the reality of needing more cash -- and soon. The unprofitable meal kit-delivery company, which touted its growth prospects to potential investors on its IPO roadshow, has leaned on its marketing strategy to build a customer base. That outreach eats up a fifth of the company’s total spending.

This tells you all you need to know about the moronic state of IPOs in the "Tech Sector." It's laughable to call a grocery delivery business a tech company just because they have a website, but hey, I don't make the rules. Anyway, "In its IPO prospectus, the company warned that it may never be profitable, adding that it anticipates that “operating expenses and capital expenditures will increase substantially in the foreseeable future.” Got that? In print, it tells you they're not even trying to be a real company. It's free beer tomorrow, forever. Mr. Ponzi to the white phone!

C.O. ‘Doc’ Erickson, Alfred Hitchcock Associate, Dies at 93

He began his career at Paramount Pictures, serving as production manager on five Hitchcock films: “Rear Window” (1954), “To Catch a Thief” (1955), “The Trouble with Harry” (1955), “The Man Who Knew Too Much” (1956), and “Vertigo” (1958).

An astonishing body of basically anonymous work. There are much worse epitaphs than that in that town. Ask Lupe Velez.

A Very Scary Light Show: Exploding H-Bombs In Space

Back in the summer of 1962, the U.S. blew up a hydrogen bomb in outer space, some 250 miles above the Pacific Ocean. It was a weapons test, but one that created a man-made light show that has never been equaled — and hopefully never will.

Good thing that H-Bomb didn't wreck the Earth's Van Allen belt and suspenders.

Watching a film, TV show or music video you despise can offer its own pleasure – and, surprisingly, hatred can spawn success

Despite the embarrassment of rich, beautiful storytelling on TV, many of
us indulge in exactly this sort of time-wasting habit: hate-watching
has reached new heights. Fed by almost endless options for shows to
watch, bolstered by the snark contest that social media has become,
viewers now regularly revel in finding plot holes and analysing
awfulness just as much as they delight in quality programming. 

For forty years, I've been listening to people, male and female, highbrow and lowbrow, explaining that they don't really like the soap operas they watch religiously. The author would be happier if she admitted she was shallow and not too bright.

With a single wiretap order, US authorities listened in on 3.3 million phone calls

3.3 million phone calls? Was there one tween girl on the warrant, or two?

Robot furniture wants to make your apartment feel bigger

You invented a Murphy Bed with buggy software added. Yes, you're all geniuses.

The Internet as existential threat

The whole premise of the Internet is the connecting of disparate networks. It started out by only connecting computer networks. But today it connects networks of vastly different sorts: computers, yes, but also financial networks, distribution networks, road networks, water networks, power networks, communication networks, social networks. It truly is “Inter” now. As we rush towards putting more and more things “in the cloud,” as we rush towards an Internet of Things with no governance beyond profit motive and anarchy, what we’re effectively doing is creating a massive single point of failure for every system we put in it.

My experience with computing and the internet is very extensive. I feel as though I have seen enough to form an overall opinion: It was all a big mistake. The entire tech sector should be rolled back to Microsoft Office and land lines. We'd all be happier, and any important stuff would still get done. Of course, a company that occasionally delivers cardboard boxes filled with wilted arugula couldn't IPO for a third of a billion without the internet, but no plan is perfect.

Happy Saturday, everyone!