Maggie's Farm

We are a commune of inquiring, skeptical, politically centrist, capitalist, anglophile, traditionalist New England Yankee humans, humanoids, and animals with many interests beyond and above politics. Each of us has had a high-school education (or GED), but all had ADD so didn't pay attention very well, especially the dogs. Each one of us does "try my best to be just like I am," and none of us enjoys working for others, including for Maggie, from whom we receive neither a nickel nor a dime. Freedom from nags, cranks, government, do-gooders, control-freaks and idiots is all that we ask for.

Our Recent Essays Behind the Front Page

Much Sorry with Delays
Birth, Death and All That Stuff in Between
How to Honor Labor Day, Every Day
My Yom Kippur Miracle (Repost from 2010)
Good intro to fly casting
Peach update, with pie
NYC update
Easy for you to say: To the elites on mass immigration
For NYC on 9/11, Sailors' Snug Harbor
Pickled Peaches
Water Shoes
Labor Costs in U.S.
Your "identity"
Good news about The Great Courses
Uses of Hot Pepper Jelly/Sauce, Chutneys, and Jams
A Saturday Drive to Litchfield County, CT
How to Pick a Kayak
Civilized: Fruit forks and knives
Loads of kayaking on Cape Cod
Psychology Experiments' Questionable Results

Categories


All categories

Quicksearch

Links

Blog Administration

Open login screen

RSS Readers

Add to Google

Subscribe with Bloglines

Monday, April 28. 2008

Why I Write For Maggie's Farm

You know, people often ask me why I write for Maggie's Farm. That's a poser, as we say on the Farm.

Truth be told, the proprietor of this sorry place, Bird Dog, promised me hookers and blow if I joined the Maggie's team. So I attended the Christmas party expecting great things. It didn't work out exactly as I had planned.

At this point, it's just plain stubbornness keeping me around. On a farm, sometimes being stubborn is all you got.

Posted by Roger de Hauteville in Hot News & Misc. Short Subjects, Our Essays at 10:09 | Comments (19) | Trackbacks (0)

Trackbacks
Trackback specific URI for this entry

No Trackbacks

Comments
Display comments as (Linear | Threaded)

Roger,
What's the beef? Why just in the picture you can see the hookers, one with an up-skirt shot, the other with a kleenx at the ready hanging out of her pocket to clean up the , ah, essence.

BD, almost Zoot suited looks like a GoodFella so I'm sure I see the blow on the bar...

Don't you normally look under "Mature Escorts" when you're in Vegas anyway?
#1 Anonymous on 2008-04-28 10:26 (Reply)
Roger:

I clearly said "No Cameras" at our Farm Christmas party.
#1.1 BD on 2008-04-28 10:33 (Reply)
here's a tip for next party: behavioral shrinks say smiling will cause the face muscles to send your brain a "I am happy" signal.
#2 buddy larsen on 2008-04-28 10:47 (Reply)
and the one chick is wang chung on the rug. ultimate party .

oh btw..don't miss no Country for Old Men
#3 Anonymous on 2008-04-28 10:51 (Reply)
Do you play lead, old man?
#3.1 Meta on 2008-04-28 11:36 (Reply)
she's "calling Roy"

"ROYYY--RROYYY--"
#3.2 buddy larsen on 2008-04-28 11:50 (Reply)
The "hooker" on the left is vomiting what is termed "coffee-ground" vomit, which means she has blood in her stomach. I can tell from here.

If she is still alive, take her to an ER at once!
#4 Dr. Bliss on 2008-04-28 11:17 (Reply)
Good thing she's spewing in the wastebasket so they can re-infuse. WAIT! Did she finish off the Jim Beam already, cause the bottle's empty?
#4.1 Steve on 2008-04-28 16:13 (Reply)
So, Roger, lemme see if I got this straight.

Are you saying you ain't gonna work on Maggie's farm no more?

You wake in the morning,
Fold your hands and pray for rain.
You got a head full of ideas
That are drivin' you insane?

It's a shame the way BD makes you scrub the floor,
so you ain't gonna work on Maggie's farm no more??

Somebody ought to put your sad story to music!
#5 Dr. Merc on 2008-04-28 11:48 (Reply)
He cannot leave. We have him on retainer.
#5.1 BD on 2008-04-28 11:53 (Reply)
retainer: (noun) white coat with extra-long sleeves tied in back, often worn with butterfly net over head.
#5.1.1 buddy larsen on 2008-04-28 12:04 (Reply)
Buddy. A retainer is that thing you wear in your mouth after you get your braces off. I know some stuff.
#5.1.1.1 Meta on 2008-04-28 13:09 (Reply)
no conflict -- former for mentally ill, latter for dentally ill
#5.1.1.1.1 buddy larsen on 2008-04-28 13:34 (Reply)
looks like I missed a great party! when did the invites go out? I must have been shoveling the pig slop........ lol
#6 opie on 2008-04-28 12:21 (Reply)
After viewing the picture of the Maggie's Farm Christmas Party, I think Victoria's Secret should consider marketing a line of geriatric lingerie.

Support hose would be much more attractive attached to lacy garters.

Gee, imagine that runway show.
#7 Lesley on 2008-04-28 14:46 (Reply)
Needs more cowbell.
#8 Mister Snitch (Link) on 2008-04-28 20:11 (Reply)
MS, can you name the band and the song ?
#8.1 buddy larsen on 2008-04-28 20:20 (Reply)
jeez -- forget that -- it's got a huge wiki. i spend a lifetime remembering usleless trivia and in an instant the damn internet obsoletes me.

www.wikipedia.org/wiki/More_cowbell
#8.1.1 buddy larsen on 2008-04-28 20:37 (Reply)
"i spend a lifetime remembering usleless trivia and in an instant the damn internet obsoletes me."

Speak softly, and carry a big iPhone.
#8.1.1.1 Mister Snitch (Link) on 2008-04-29 10:16 (Reply)

Add Comment
(Your e-mail will not show in your comment)

By commenting on this site you agree to the site rules listed here. Email
addresses will not be displayed and will only be used for email notifications.

Quick reference guide: [i] italics [/i], [b] bold [/b], [u] underline [/u],
[url] (web address) [/url]. More tips here.

Enclosing asterisks marks text as bold (*word*), underscore are made via _word_.
E-Mail addresses will not be displayed and will only be used for E-Mail notifications.

To prevent automated Bots from commentspamming, please enter the string you see in the image below in the appropriate input box. Your comment will only be submitted if the strings match. Please ensure that your browser supports and accepts cookies, or your comment cannot be verified correctly.
CAPTCHA

BBCode format allowed
 
 
A Chris Southern Consulting website.