I mentioned a friend who died of a similar version of mine from 2021. We did learn her diagnosis in April 2020 and lasted 17 months. She was great, hilarious and deeply involved in many ways. The downside may have been related to her husband. It is not good to learn. He was a great guy. But it seems he started out on board and deeply involved, eventually met with some hard times and by the end had removed himself from many of the details. Based on my experience, I believe I can see how it may develop over time. He stepped out entirely of the process. The victim, our friend's, mom and sister tossed themselves in for support and assistance and guidance. She held up extremely well with their assistance. Her mind was intact all through, but she could not have surgery at all (I can to some small degree).
The upside was lots of digging and travel to find conversations. The downside, similar to mine is that nothing is happening. Nothing available. She even gave up the chemo and radiation for two reasons, it set her off badly and she did not feel better. Thankfully, MY version of this has, early on, been a bit better. There are downsides for me which I need to work on from time to time. For me, this past week in particular, heavy emotional shifting occurs on certain days for short times. Mrs. Bulldog and I have had some heavy fighting - but Mrs. Bulldog is a master and takes on, managing the hyper issues - she is a saint. After moments where the chemo makes me emotionally aggressive, I do manage to resolve. It takes time and effort. The real problem is not often, but the problems happen on both sides. Often she is the hero, but sometimes it resolves around a decision to listen then engage separate from conversation - completely misunderstanding my position well, and it leads to problems from time to time. It can be unfair of me and it may be too much at times. It is, no doubt, a requirement for me to remember to resolve and address more effectively. In fairness, remember I can't always control things as fairly or evenly as I can in a momentary discussion about our medical and/or conversational paths forward. Sometimes I'm not wrong to get upset over poor decisions - sometimes people just assume things "as is" where it may require help or time. Other times it's my fault and I have to walk it all back well. I'm deeply sorry when that happens.
Listening to the friend and her stories was distressing. I'm sure she had similar situations. Which may have led to her husband's eventual stepping aside. It's not easy, but I'm lucky to have someone who isn't stepping aside. So I am learning from our friend's situation. She, unfortunately, began to see the mental loss around 16 months in. She suffered a stroke in the final month and held for 4 days afterward. I have deep hopes I can hold longer and find more opportunities. Reality is speaking openly, though, and that is important to stay on top of effectively. I am blessed from my family in many ways. And many friends.
I feel awful for our friend who passed and everything which occurred along the way. I know I make errors at times to my family while taking the medication and how it hits my emotions after some time passes. But I do shift back. I try to avoid it as much as I can. I can't imagine what our friend went through and I bless her and her husband (who passed several years later) for missing opportunities. I want to avoid that as well as I can, and I will try to as much as I can.
