I plan to keep myself in fighting shape so I can fulfill that job, or duty, or whatever you call it. Little boys, little girls, whatever comes my way. I am prepared.
My plan them is to teach my family ways, to transfer my culture. I will talk with them about books, I will take them on hikes in the woods, I will teach them my secrets about the trees and the birds and amphibians and reptiles and fish and wildflowers, and all of their names. I will teach them how to use a hand saw and a table saw, and how to screw a screw and how to nail a nail. How to make a rustic outdoor table.
I will quote to them from Milton, the Bible, and Shakespeare while I take them on fishing hikes to mountain lakes, valley streams, Atlantic bays, and the ocean itself. I know from myself that grandkids remember every word their grandfathers utter and every bit of lore they convey.
I will reprimand them when they behave uncivilly or in an unsportsmanlike manner. I will teach them firearms and archery. I will teach them how to comport themselves at my NYC club, and how to dine with adults in an adult venue. I would be happy to introduce them to sailing craft, or handling powerboats for that matter. I will expose them to serious music and talk to them about it. I will encourage them towards the discipline of making serious music, or any music.
My two grandpas together helped teach me all of these things and I am forever grateful for that. My Mom and Dad were busy with all of the other kids, plus work of course.
I learned a lot besides all that from my two genteel Grandpas, including how to handle hunting dogs (Don't give them an inch, or they'll take a mile"), handling horses ("Dumb as rocks. Show them who's boss, and they will do anything you want."), and driving tractors on New England hills ("attend to the angles").
They also taught me how to speak with adults. "Ask them about themselves. Learn all you can from them."
Sports? I am no athlete but I would be joyful to swat tennis balls with a kid or kids for hours. Just buy me a couple of beers after as compensation. Interest and cheerful cooperation are required. I am sorry, but the business-essential art of golf is not in my repertoire.
My own Christmas kids are the best, and I will welcome some Christmas grandkids when the time is ripe.
