I'm not ashamed of the fact that I've been laid off 4 times in the last 20 years. I work in a business which has undergone significant transformations in the last 15 years and it is particularly sensitive to recessions. More importantly, it is an industry which has engaged and embraced 'diversity' as a goal, meaning the supposed benefits of being a white male (which were slim to begin with) are more or less nonexistent today.
2 years of unemployment over a 20 year period isn't too bad when you consider how many people are still looking for steady work since 2008. I have a number of friends who have left this industry and entered new careers. It's tough to start over when you're past the age of 45. Which is why I'm glad I'm working and complain very little about my job. I make less than others with similar experience to mine, mainly because each bout of unemployment forced me to rearrange my salary needs and alter spending patterns. This is unfortunate, now that I have 2 kids in college, but it's good, too. I'm less likely to face the ax again since my experience comes cheap.
But I haven't been around Maggie's lately, and it's because I've had issues I'd classify as "First World Problems" over the past few months, which are better than the alternative "Big Problems". But it's worth sharing one in particular because it may help others with perspective, and it sure helps me with dealing with it.
I was recently up for a promotion. I had every reason to believe the job was mine. The EVP consulted with me on the job description, I developed the job with her, my interviews all went great, the EVP told me I was the top candidate. Yet, when the decision came down, it went to a very nice young lady from a department completely unrelated to what I do for a living. I have spent the past few months teaching the job to a person 17 years younger than me. It's not a salary issue, either. We were at equivalent levels, and she isn't making less than they'd have paid me.
After the decision, I was casting about for answers, so I requested time to speak with the EVP.
I realized attitude was everything. I couldn't walk in, complain, moan, whine and tell her she made a mistake. Instead I walked in, told her I'm on board, the department will continue to outperform, and whatever I could do to make it better, I'd do. Rather than ask her why I didn't get the job, I asked what I could do to improve so I would get the next promotion. Her answers were very concise and clear, there was nothing that hadn't been discussed in a job review, but none were distinctly obvious reasons to give the job to someone with so much less experience. That's just fate. I have to accept my circumstances and move forward.
What was critical was how I approached the questions. I made it about my desire to give what is best to the company and the value I could bring to make the company better, rather than focusing on myself and what I didn't get.
In today's economy little nuances like this are important. I have a job. It pays well. I enjoy it, and it's with a good company and with good people. I've had many worse jobs. I've only had one or two better ones. Rather than be disgruntled, I would position myself as a valuable and loyal employee who will generate returns for the company.
The shift in departments has meant I've had to refocus on some new responsibilities over the past few months, and I've had to help generate goodwill with a person with whom I was unfamiliar. The time spent indicates things are good, and I have every reason to believe it's because that I didn't let my initial disappointment get the better of me. Going to the gym and working out for 3 hours right after I got the information helped, too.
Will I get a promotion at some point? I have no idea. A co-worker who also came from another organization in the last three years, as I did, recently said "pedigree is everything here." I agree. My new boss has worked here since she left college. She knows many people because her previous job gave her contact to many more departments than I interact with. That kind of recognition pays off more than vast experience, at times. The same co-worker suggested my boss could be good for me, since she might help me 'get' the pedigree I need. Maybe, if that's what counts, she will.
As I teach my boys, bitching and moaning about what you didn't get or what you wanted is counter-productive. Besides, nobody wants to read, or hear me, as I lambaste my EVP and my new boss. Mainly because neither deserve it, and both are decent people. More importantly, that is boring and self-serving. Even in disappointment there are lessons which can help move us to be better than we were. I figure I learned a few.
This is new territory for me. Typically I jumped ship when I didn't get a promotion I thought I deserved. But maybe I can learn something from my new boss. Even if I can't, I will exhibit behaviors which prove I'm not an old-school type employee some might infer I appear to be. I know I'm more accommodating of new ideas and trends than the younger people on our team. We'll see if it counts for something. I have every reason to believe it will.
