Maggie's Farm

Henry Beard and Christopher Cerf put this grimly humorous book together. My copy of the book is dated 1993, but it is more relevant today than it was back then as this self-parodying stuff has permeated the language - some as jokes, eg "vertically-challenged," and some seriously, eg "special child" and "partner."

I am sad to report that the book is out of print, but it still can be gotten via Amazon. Sample entries:

Vagrant.  Nonspecifically-destinationed individual; directionally-impoverished person.

Phallocentrism: The use, by white heterosexual males, of such discredited devices as reasoning and logic to maintain a position of sexual and political dominance.

First Baseperson.  The correct gender-inclusive term for first baseman, recommended by the Little League.

Prisoner. Client of the correctional system, guest in a correctional institution, incarcerated American.

Pro-abortion. Pro-choice.

Shoplifter. Nontraditional shopper.

Grammar. Defined by Lewis Lapham as "arbitrary rules of procedure subservient to a sexist political agenda."

Pet owner. The American Humane Society says the appropriate term is "human companion of a nonhuman companion."

Morally different. Dishonest, evil.

Jungle. Tropical Rainforest. The term "jungle" is ideologically unsuitable because of its use in such insensitive phrases as "It's a jungle out there."

Difficult-to-serve. Canadian educators' term for sociopathic. Example: "Professor McLaughlin was robbed at gunpoint by one of his difficult-to-serve students."

Smellism. Discrimination against, or stigmatization or oppression of a human or nonhuman being because his/her/its nondiscretionary body odor is deemed to be unpleasant.

Ableism.  The Smith College Office of Student Affairs defines this as "oppression of the differently abled by the temporarily able."

Every entry in the book has an academic citation.