We are a commune of inquiring, skeptical, politically centrist, capitalist, anglophile, traditionalist New England Yankee humans, humanoids, and animals with many interests beyond and above politics. Each of us has had a high-school education (or GED), but all had ADD so didn't pay attention very well, especially the dogs. Each one of us does "try my best to be just like I am," and none of us enjoys working for others, including for Maggie, from whom we receive neither a nickel nor a dime. Freedom from nags, cranks, government, do-gooders, control-freaks and idiots is all that we ask for.
I used to recommend Stop Walking On Eggshells to family members, but this looks good. Will give it a try.
Assistant Village Idiot
Navigating destructive relationships.
Easy peasy. You can't fix them. Don't waste your time. Get away from them. If they are related only talk to them on the phone and when they start, tell them clearly that you don't want to hear that crap and if they don't stop you will hang up. They will, out of necessity find someone else to destroy. But you must keep them at arms length or gone forever.
Having had to deal with my younger brother who has a paranoid, rage-filled personality, I agree with your approach wholeheartedly. He ruined my mother's life, and I believe she died early (at 64) just to get away from him because she couldn't bring herself to turn her back on her only son. But I have, because when she was gone, he wanted to make me a substitute "mother" he thought he could bully. As a result, he doesn't know where I am now, and I no longer know where he is or even if he's alive. I don't want to know.