When it comes to movies, I have to confess that I've been seriously disappointed with most of the Westerns I've watched in recent years. To pick on a few:
Unforgiven — Wow, a Clint Eastwood western. That means it's got to be good, right? Yeah, except there was one gun fight in the whole dang thing, and probably the most unrealistic gun fight in cinematic history, at that. Yawn.
Appaloosa — Just can't go wrong with Ed Harris, Renée Zellweger and Viggo Mortensen, right? Yeah, except the writers spent 90% of the movie dealing with the intricate, puzzling, lurid, soap-opera relationship between Ed Harris, Renée Zellweger and Viggo Mortensen! As an additional plus, Hollywood was so afraid that someone in the audience might be shocked by actual gun play on the screen that they toned down the gun sounds to just below that of cap gun level.
3:10 To Yuma — Hey, Christian Bale and Russell Crowe, just can't go wrong with that duo, right? Okay, picture the following:
The movie opens with twenty bad guys chasing a stage, greed in their eyes. The guy on the stage riding shotgun (hence the term) is firing back with a big shotgun, picking them off here and there. This goes on for endless minutes. Then the camera is a quarter mile ahead of the stage as Russell Crowe drives a herd of cattle across the road, blocking it. The stage comes wheeling to a stop. All in all, a very effective, efficient way to stop a stage — EXCEPT THAT TEN OF YOUR BUDDIES ARE LYING DEAD ON THE ROAD BACK THERE!!
The rest of the movie was just some big 'war of wills' between Crowe and Bale — which was really the point of the movie in the first place; to display the writers' brilliant virtuosity — and the fact that it took place in western times was more or less irrelevant.
The Assassination of Jesse James — Hey, Brad Pitt and Casey Affleck, just can't go wrong with that combo, right? Actually, I have no idea. I was too busy heaving my guts into the toilet because of Affleck's acting performance — or lack thereof. Let me know how it turned out. Did Jesse live?
Silverado, Open Range, Wyatt Earp — For the love of God, won't someone PLEASE tell Kevin Costner to stop playing cowboys? I'm sorry — I honestly love the guy and think he's brilliant as a sports hero (Bull Durham, Field of Dreams, Tin Cup, For Love of the Game) — but with those boyish cheekbones, weak chin and soft voice, he simply doesn't look or sound the part of the tough Westerner. By means of comparison, check out Kurt Russell's performance as Earp in the link below. That's what a Westerner looks and sounds like.
Tombstone — I'd give this thing an 'A' if it hadn't spent endless, interminable minutes bogged down in his wife's endless, interminable opium problem.
Wild Wild West — Both the critics and every decent movie lover in the world hated this thing, so naturally I loved it. The superb 'anti-chemistry' between Will Smith and Kevin Kline hasn't been seen since the unlikely pairing of Eddie Murphy and Robert De Niro in Showtime. While not an outright 'Western' by genre (it would more properly fit in the category of 'Western Sci-Fi'), at least there were loud guns and galloping horses.
The Quick and the Dead — I actually thought this was a pretty good flick, but it wasn't a Western, as such, in the sense that it all took place in the middle of a street and, as a dueling event, could have taken place in Al Capone's Chicago or even today. Gene Hackman is such a badass that I made him #2 on my cinematic Tough Guys page.
So, all in all, I've been quite disappointed with Westerns in recent years.
Then up rode Jonah Hex:
"Cut muhself shavin'. What happened to yours?"
That pretty much says it all. Without giving anything away, it's a straight-up Western with one additional element of... (gropes for proper word)... spirituality that really makes it something special. Josh Brolin stars, John Malkovich is the merciless bad guy, and Megan Fox turns in a spectacular role as dragon bait.
Below the fold we'll take a peek at the new BBC presentation of the (ongoing) Sherlock Holmes story.
Admittedly, the idea of a "modern-day Sherlock Holmes" turned me off at first — as it should have.
But, as you'll see in the clip, the guy who plays Sherlock — with the endearingly British name of Benedict Cumberbatch — is loads of fun, and the way the show gives us the same clues that Sherlock gets — but without his interpretation — sticks with the traditional Holmes standard of letting the readers in on the clues, but letting Holmes put them together when he's good and ready.
I'd add that they do a terrific job of developing Watson's character, from his hesitant first day with Holmes (above), to his jumping in at the end of the episode with his British Army marksmanship saving the day.
The bad news is that there are only three episodes, available on Netflix and presumably Blockbuster, but at least they're movie length at an hour and a half apiece. The Netflix description calls it the "opening season" so hopefully there'll be more.
On an additional
Holmesian note, my thanks to Marianne for suggesting in the comments of my
review of 'Sherlock Holmes' (with Robert Downey) that I check out the Holmes TV series played by Jeremy Brett. It's terrific and Brett plays the eccentric Holmes to perfection. I put my favorite episode online
here.
I thought it appropriate to group these three movies together since they all have that same warm, fuzzy feel to them. Not to mention a hot chick! Or, at least in the case of True Grit, hot under the collar! True Grit Doc's List Of The T
Tracked: Feb 09, 17:30