People vary enormously in their levels of life functioning, talents, and life-mastery, don't they? Nature confers variety - not equality - because variety is essential for a species to survive when circumstances change.
You could make a graph of the people you meet by rating their functioning in various areas on a 0-10 scale:
- Social skills, personal charm, manners, graciousness, general behavioral appropriateness and adaptability, dignity and demeanor;
- personality style and temperament;
- IQ, intellectual skills and depth, range of knowledge;
- physical skills;
- morality and strength of character, tendency to blame or to assume responsibility, and desire to assume responsibility;
- ability to delay gratification/impulsivity;
- coping abilities under stress, pressure, pain and strong emotion;
- sense of humor;
- emotional stability, predictability, and maturity;
- judgement, planfulness, and decision-making;
- capacity for kindness, thoughtfulness, empathy and love vs self-centeredness;
- degree of "neuroticism;"
- special talents and interests;
- reliability, and trustworthiness;
- work ethic, energy, persistence, perseverance despite fear or difficulty;
- realism vs. naivete and childishness;
- independence, ambition and initiative;
- risk tolerance, adventurousness and aggressiveness;
- curiosity and range of knowledge;
- self-discipline;
- creativeness, imagination and cleverness
...and so forth.
Feel free to graph yourself on these items - but do not call me if you feel depressed afterwards. We are supposed to identify our weaknesses, and to work on them if we feel motivated to do so.
Most of these qualities are subsumed under what we term "ego functions." (We shrinks use the term "ego" to refer to the tools we have to mediate between our "inner" selves and external reality, not the casual, non-technical meaning of "self-centeredness.") My well-exercised shrink brain tends to measure these things about people on autopilot, even when I try to turn it off. (I also "take my own inventory" frequently with pitiless honesty, and I have my own share of frailties.)
Nevertheless, all of these factors feed into one's ability to construct a life in a free country. Yes, a life must be constructed like a building, but usually with changes along the way.
Fortunately, the world offers things for almost every person to do - and in which to excel if they wish - regardless of how their unique graph maps out. It's generally the pattern of strengths and weaknesses that matters, not the overall "score."
However, I can say, after many years of careful observation of humans, that the folks I have known with the highest overall scores have been military officers, physicians, ranchers, and investment bankers. Don't argue that with me - that's just my own limited life experience.
Many of the most interesting people I have known have very high scores in some areas and very low ones in other areas. That might be part of what makes people interesting. Perfect scores would be the most boring person in the world.
But that doesn't matter, because in America we all play the cards we are dealt, and we all get to make the most of what we have - and to try to develop where we are lacking if we want to, and we get to play out our hand in whatever way we chose, given the heavy constraints of mean old Mr. Harsh Reality (including the chance to write run-on sentences).
