Again, as I mentioned in the last AGW/NGC/ACW/NGW update, we're catching a hint of desperation in the air. The North Pole is melting! — except that the slush pond pic they splashed all over the Internet was taken over 300 miles south of the North Pole.
And did you click on the Norilsk link?
Norilsk Breaks Records For Arctic Heat In A New Sign Of Changing Weather Patterns
Yep, them changing weather patterns is finally here as verified by the bikini-clad sunbathers right there before your disbelieving eyes. Sure, the picture was taken what looked to be about 10,000 miles south of Norilsk — but never mind those pesky details!
Well, before we continue, let's make sure any new readers are up to speed on the marvelous variety of science-based global climate models we now have to choose from:
— If you believe the science, then it's obvious that Anthropogenic Global Warming (AGW) is the villain.
— On the other hand, if you believe the science, then there's no question that Natural Global Cooling (NGC) is the true menace.
— However, if you believe the science, then it's quite apparent that Anthropogenic Chlorofluorocarbonic Warming (ACW) is the real threat.
— But, for those who believe the science, it's crystal-clear that Natural Global Warming (NGW) is what's really goin' on.
Again, it's all about the science, folks, and the wonderful options it provides.
The exciting news today is that responsible parties have finally stepped up and taken control of the problem, leaving all of those biased and subsidized "scientists" out in the cold — so to speak. I think we can all cheer that the issue has finally been removed from the political arena and that clinical, impartial pragmatists are finally in control.
CIA Wants To Control The Weather, Climate Change
The CIA is funding a study examining various ways mankind can geo-engineer the planet -- blocking or limiting the sunlight that reaches the Earth, stripping carbon dioxide from the skies, seeding the clouds and so on.
So they're keeping all options open, as good pragmatists should.
And they have the highest backing our nation can offer:
The project, a panel called “Geoengineering Climate: Technical Evaluation and Discussion of Impacts,” is backed by the National Academy of Sciences, the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA), NASA -- and the U.S. intelligence community.
Of course, the naysayers and doubters will come out of the woodwork and claim they're just doing it to make a bunch of fat-cat corporations happy, and, while true, at least they're right up front about it:
“All of our sponsors are interested in this topic as a part of the larger climate-change discussion,” he said.
As for why this smart group suddenly stepped to the fore to solve this difficult problem once and for all is easy to understand.
It's for the children.
A 2008 study by the National Intelligence Council concluded that climate change posted a serious threat to national security.
When your great-grandchild doesn't die because she accidentally locked herself out of the house for 35 minutes because she's living in what's been relabeled the Temperate Boiling Zone where a human being can only survive for roughly 30 minutes in the blazing heat, you'll have the CIA to thank for her deliverance.
So, to sum things up at this point:
— If you believe in AGW, then you're comforted to know that smart minds are finally stepping in to solve the problem.
— If you believe in ACW, then you're happy that the worst is over with.
— But if you believe in NGC, then you must be worried that the CIA is doing all it can to ensure the next ice age.
— And if you believe in NGW, then nothing anybody can do is going to make any difference and we're all doomed anyway.
So, on the good/bad meter, we're basically batting .500 at this point. On the other hand, that's good enough for the Hall of Fame.
So we've got that going for us.
