We are a commune of inquiring, skeptical, politically centrist, capitalist, anglophile, traditionalist New England Yankee humans, humanoids, and animals with many interests beyond and above politics. Each of us has had a high-school education (or GED), but all had ADD so didn't pay attention very well, especially the dogs. Each one of us does "try my best to be just like I am," and none of us enjoys working for others, including for Maggie, from whom we receive neither a nickel nor a dime. Freedom from nags, cranks, government, do-gooders, control-freaks and idiots is all that we ask for.
A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her 5-year-old son
playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train
stop and her son saying, "All of you sons of bitches who want off, get the
hell off now...cause this is the last stop!" "And all of you sons of
bitches who are getting on, get your asses on the train...cause we're going
down the tracks."
The horrified mother went in and told her son, "We don't use that kind
of language in this house." "Now I want you to go to your room and you are
to stay there for TWO HOURS." "When you come out, you may play with your
train...but I want you to use nice language."
Two hours later, the son came out of the bedroom and resumed playing
train. Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son
say..."All passengers, please remember your things, thank you and we hope your
trip was a pleasant one." "We hope you will ride with us again soon."
She heard her little darling continue... "For those of you just
boarding, remember, there is no smoking in the train." "We hope you will have a
pleasant and relaxing journey with us today."
As the mother began to smile, the child added, "For those of you who
are pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the bitch in the
TOP TEN THOUGHTS FOR 2008
Life is sexually transmitted.
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
Some people are like a Slinky ... Not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00 and a substantial tax cut saves you $0.30?
In the '60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2008:
We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America , but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.
And the BONUS thought for today
"Life is like a jar of jalapeņos. What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow".