Maggie's Farm

This just in from Old Doc Higgins in Rhode Island:

Everyone has ADD, and all boys have ADHD. Just a matter of degree. Heck, I remember back in med school, during the lecture on the use of ether for anesthesia, spending the whole time undressing (mentally) a gal in the front row (only gal in the class - this was 19 and 41 - and she was a bow-wow, too, but eventually she let me...(edited for family reading...), and I didn't remember a thing about the class. See, I have a bad case of ADD too. But it didn't matter - back then, I'd just have the patient chaw on a lead bullet and rip out their appendix, or their whatever. Ether-shmeether. We'd re-use those bullets until they were chawed to bits - didn't wash 'em either. There was a war on - needed those bullets to kill Krauts and Japs. So, to save bullets, they came up with this new-fangled novocaine stuff for the whining wussies. I'd have nothing of it - No Sir. Nowadays, it's more complicated, but I like to stick to the old, tried-and-true ways when I can. When I can remember them.