Maggie's Farm

I read once that a bar tender was a better source of life advice than is a professional. A lot of people need "attention". Give them attention and they "seem" to improve. Take it away and they may well be worse than before. Most people with mental health issues who are functional or somewhat functional can function much better with a love interest/partner. But that is a mixed bag because most people with mental health issues have/create conflict with their partners out of need of drama/attention/defensiveness.

It would be wonderful if a psychiatrist/psychoanalyst could fix a person with mental illness but in general they cannot. They can sometimes get a short term result because they are feeding the patients need for attention. They can often appear to be getting results with patients who are court mandated (or imprisoned) because the patient is smart enough to tell them what they need to hear. But in general the mental health issue cannot be fixed/cured and probably the best you can hope for is that the patient learns more coping skills and becomes functioning within society.

The old way of dealing with dysfunctional mental patients was to lock them up in asylums. This was the worst solution until the ACLU got them all released and now we know an even worse solution is to foist them on society. There is no good solution. Simple as that. If you "give" a mentally ill person what they need/want then they become dependent on this and become even less functional. If you don't give them what they need/want then their dysfunction will often cause them to commit crimes or at the least act in uncivil and unacceptable ways.

It is possible that it is in fact a mental illness to continue to try to help them after you finally figure out how fruitless and harmful it is to try.

If I could wave a magic wand and fix these kinds of social problems I would. But the reality of homelessness is that 99% of homeless people are drug, alcoholics and/or mentally ill. A normal person or family who finds themselves homeless can easily avail themselves of the many programs to help them find housing and work. But drug and alcohol user's generally cannot use these programs for the simple reason that they screen for drug and alcohol problems (and/or activities that drug and alcohol users follow). Therefore in this instance these people DO in fact choose to be homeless. That is they will not give up drugs/alcohol and prefer to sleep on the street than to abide by the rules of facilities who would house and feed them.

This country doesn't have a homeless problem THAT is the symptom. Efforts and money thrown at treating that symptom are worse then useless because it reinforces the willingness of the addict to stay addicted.

What we need is a tough love program where anyone found drunk or high or sleeping on the streets is sentenced to 30 days in jail. No treatment, now kid gloves, just jail where they will dry out unwillingly. Release them after 30 days and require them to work and stay clean. If they are caught drunk or high again 30 more days in jail, ad infinitum. This won't "cure" them all but those who refuse to clean up will learn to stay away from cities and normal people simply so they don't go to jail.

The sad truth is most people who are mentally ill have no clue the harm they cause their families and friends. One the other side of that coin it can totally ruin your life to try to help them and most of what you try to do will be interpreted by them as harming them and they will turn against you. While it may be true that not everyone who is mentally ill is dangerous it is probable that everyone who is mentally ill is potentially dangerous AND unpredictable. Help them at your own risk but be aware that at best your efforts won't be appreciated, won't help in the long term AND will probably do more harm than good.