Why do some women lose their sex drive?

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Tuesday, September 8. 2020

Why do some women lose their sex drive?

Why Women Lose Interest in Sex. Loss of sexual desire is women's biggest sexual problem, and it's not all in their heads.

Sex drive, which doctors prefer to term "libido," refers to a biological urge to mate, or to find sexual stimulation or release in non-relational ways.

Sex drive, if not sexual interest, declines with age in men and women but I joke that a "dirty old man" is just an ordinary young man trapped in an older body and that there is no comparable term for women.

I do not consider it to be a "disorder" when some post-menopausal women lose their youthful needs and desires because it is all variance of normal based on hormonal changes, relational issues, physical issues, fitness issues, etc etc.

My ideal, though, is for women and men to maintain a fun sex life of some sort for a lifetime.

PS: When in med school one time they showed us a video of elder porn. It was a couple in their 80s having fun with eachother and laughing in bed. It was eye-opening to us kids. A good thing.

Posted by Dr. Joy Bliss in Psychology, and Dr. Bliss at 14:30 | Comments (21) | Trackbacks (0)

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I believe that, from an evolutionary standpoint, post-menopausal women know (consciously or unconsciously) that their reproductive purpose has ended and that, outside of pleasure, sex is pretty much meaningless. Unfortunately, for the reasons you state, pleasurable sex is often out of reach. However, according to the grandmother hypothesis, post-menopausal women continue to serve an evolutionary purpose by helping their younger daughters in full reproductive bloom fulfill their own pre-menopausal evolutionary purpose. That said, as you note, old men have a younger man's sex drive, though diminished, and can still reproduce and pass on their genes; hence, the number of elderly fathers out there (usually wealthy or celebrities). The downside? Most men die well before women do.

#1 RetiredSOF on 2020-09-08 15:28 (Reply)

Actually, the downside is the damaged grandpa sperm producing a hugely disproportionate number of autistic and developmentally delayed children.

#1.1 jm01 on 2020-09-08 17:04 (Reply)

Prove it!!!

#1.1.1 Anon on 2020-09-08 17:14 (Reply)

If you read the whole study, it was actually pool boy sperm that produced a hugely disproportionate number of autistic and developmentally delayed children. It turns out the grandpas were shooting -- or more accurately dribbling -- blanks.

#1.1.2 Talnik on 2020-09-08 18:16 (Reply)

I didn't know women had sex drives. I've never known one to have one, not around me at least. Hmmm...

#2 Talnik on 2020-09-08 15:29 (Reply)

My wife had a strong sex drive right up until the time she drank the I-131 radioactive cocktail to kill off her Thyroid gland. Then her drive dropped to zero. So whatever gland in the human female is the source of her libido will be killed along with the Thyroid. They should put warning labels on that I-131.

#3 snopercod on 2020-09-08 17:07 (Reply)

Ditto. Exactly.

#3.1 Guest on 2020-09-08 22:15 (Reply)

Thanks for confirming. Her doctor never mentioned sexual dysfunction as a possible side effect of RAI treatment.

#3.1.1 snopercod on 2020-09-09 08:26 (Reply)

Most women do lose their sex drive after menopause. Most women find it inconvenient and resent the fact that the men enjoy it more than they do. Most older women get fat to reduce the chance that hubby wants to see them naked and then want sex. What revivies their sex drive? Divorce.

#4 Anon on 2020-09-08 18:25 (Reply)

The ex discovered Prozac, in her mid-40s. That was the end. It was probably a blessing as I did meet a few women who liked sex, at least for awhile.

Nobody can "do you" better than yourself, even if someone else is there!!

#5 Tally Whagger on 2020-09-08 18:39 (Reply)

>> What revives their sex drive? Divorce.

Yes, but only in wives with little or no alimony, and, only until the $$$ rolls in consistently. Sex and money; 95% of what makes the world go 'round.

>> I did meet a few women who liked sex, at least for awhile.

See above.
?Did you stop with the presents, the dinners, the vacations?

#5.1 Riick on 2020-09-08 18:53 (Reply)

Please don't tell my wife.

#6 Stargazer on 2020-09-08 18:57 (Reply)

Some of these comments remind me of the old joke: What food group causes women to lose their sex drive?

Wedding cake.

Sorry, I couldn't resist.

#7 RetiredSOF on 2020-09-08 19:38 (Reply)

Most women resent the fact that men exist, that we breathe, the we enjoy life many times over more than they do, that we see them as inferior to us, that if they didn’t have sex to offer we wouldn’t give them the time of day and from a certain time onwards they are going to resent us more and more as the MGTOW viewpoint extends and more and more men start following it.

Feminazism didn’t change female nature. It exposed it by removing all societal shaming controls and letting and encouraging women to “be themselves”

All the 21st century female wants is a man to legally exploit, parasitize and steal from through divorce rape.

The result is not pretty.

The future looks bleak.

Tally Whagger: “Nobody can "do you" better than yourself, even if someone else is there!!” Amen to that!!

Now, women have nothing to offer men who don’t want a harridan in our lives and can manage quite well without any female input or company or anything.

A man without women can be quite happy.

One of the most remarkable discoveries of human history.

To sum it up: women don’t get to define man. No penis, no opinion.

#8 George_Banner on 2020-09-09 01:26 (Reply)

Since so many of you men seem to have no sense of humor, maybe it’s no surprise your women lost interest. Nonetheless, as a member of the post-menopausal subject group - I’ll say sex and desire is one of the things that has changed in the last 15 years. Along with athletic ability and endurance; food preferences, vision, hearing, lots of things. We are lucky to have no chemical interventions to make trouble, as it often does. What hasn’t changed for me is the value and necessity of the intimacy that comes with sex and other forms of physical affection. My husband still tells the funniest jokes in bed and we laugh and talk as we have for the last 36 years or so. He wishes he could eat all the pound cake he ate when we met and we both wish we could feel that sweet spot of peak athletic activity - running and swimming. But we still both run and swim hard and enjoy sex. And like being with each other.

#9 Emma on 2020-09-09 08:19 (Reply)

Some men have the knack of making and keeping a connection with their wives. Whether that's because they value the connection, or because they figured out that it's a prerequisite for sex in most women, I don't know. Maybe both. Those of us who have a guy like that are lucky, because we'll keep making sex happen no matter what physical challenges come along with age.

Then there are men and women who use each other (for sex, power, money, security) until one or both decide the prize isn't worth the price, so they try again with someone else before giving it up altogether.

#9.1 Texan99 on 2020-09-09 12:53 (Reply)

I think you are both correct. But it is not a consistent thing for all women. Sometimes it is the man's fault, sometimes it is the woman's and sometimes it is both or neither. Such is life; c'est la vie.

#9.1.1 Anon on 2020-09-09 16:11 (Reply)

There is a cure for this...bioidentical hormone replacement.
Testosterone did wonders for me as mine has been low since my 30's, which I only discovered when I started replacing it in my 50's. Estrogen and progesterone are also needed after menopause.

I learned about this from Suzanne Somers...she is 73 and her husband is 83 and they do it 2x per day. And she wants it, too.
An additional bonus is that it keeps you younger looking!

#10 DEB on 2020-09-09 10:02 (Reply)

I'm not pointing fingers, you understand, but sometimes post-menopausal women lose interest because the dirty old man just can't get it up anymore.

#11 RebeccaH on 2020-09-09 13:54 (Reply)

I don't suppose that Hillary was available for comment ;-)

At a guess, I suspect that a LOT of men could understand Bill's situation, to her extent.

#11.1 Tally Whagger on 2020-09-09 17:12 (Reply)

The front end of menopause is great. No more periods.A few years in, it kinda sucks. My wife and I have been together since we were kids. Now as we enter our fifties, she simply isnt able to do what she could, and would love to but can't.

#12 ccoffer on 2020-09-09 19:41 (Reply)

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Tuesday, September 8. 2020

Why do some women lose their sex drive?