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Saturday, June 2. 2018

A referral


The referring person tells me "She is a 22 year-old cum laude college grad with no goals and no direction. She was just a diligent student. No stem classes. She is living at home, and terrified by the big world. She is shy and not overly-attractive. Self-involved, alternating between self-loathing and mild grandiosity. Very supportive family. Despite her college grades, she seems to lack some basic life skills so her low self-esteem seems justified to me.  I think you would be a good fit for her if you can engage her. Self-pitying but not depressed, not psychotic."


OK. I'll do a consultation. This sad story is in my wheelhouse, and I have seen it many times. 

Posted by Dr. Joy Bliss in Psychology, and Dr. Bliss at 17:55 | Comments (19) | Trackbacks (0)

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Have her talk to a military recruiter. Enlist not officer material. Air Force or Navy. In a four year enlistment she will learn more than she did in college and she will come out self confident and with a better idea what she wants in life.
#1 Anon on 2018-06-02 18:14 (Reply)
I just have to say, I think that is really a good idea.
#1.1 Mark on 2018-06-02 19:38 (Reply)
Second Mark. Military service will bring her out into a real world.
#1.2 Claritas (Link) on 2018-06-02 21:52 (Reply)
please no, the last thing the armed forces need are more millenials with soft degrees like "diversity studies", "women's studies", or "black history studies" which this girl almost certainly has.

Might be good for her, will be a disaster for her unit.
She's better off joining the cub scouts, who now accept girls, they're her approximate mental age though from the sound of it probably a bit more mature.
#1.3 JTW on 2018-06-02 22:51 (Reply)
Nah, boot camp is apparently now all Starbucks-like woke training. Just talked to a kid fresh out of A-school and disgusted with the Navy. Basic was basically lots of lectures on not touching this person or that goup, over and over. Went in gung ho wanting to be SEAL, now just looking to do is reserve duty and get out.
#1.4 JK Brown on 2018-06-02 23:17 (Reply)
Son in the Army Reserves tells me they alternate between this and real training.
#1.4.1 Assistant Village Idiot (Link) on 2018-06-03 00:29 (Reply)
From what I've heard the navy is far worse at it than the army, possibly because of the closed quarters on ships making for more close contact between the sexes (and different "special groups" in general).

It's disgusting. And it's causing accidents, major accidents, as officers and enlisted are more concerned with ticking the right boxes on "diversity training" forms than with doing a proper job navigating, maintaining, and fighting their ships.
#1.4.1.1 JTW on 2018-06-03 02:01 (Reply)
I might try to find out if she has any interest in family life, as in, her own family. Might be good at bringing up some little cum laudes.
#2 fodderwing on 2018-06-02 22:03 (Reply)
Self-pity and low self esteem are now valid reasons for referral to a psychologist?

Not an insurance case, I hope.
#3 bobby b on 2018-06-03 01:03 (Reply)
The Military might do for her, but...

Query her on what things she's interested in. She might have a future at a... trade school (gasp!) Some skilled trades need deep brains.

Or... see if you can get her interested in STEM stuff, if she wishes to go with a college degree. Heck, having her take some STEM classes at the local community college might actually stimulate her mind. Could work, maybe.

Good luck with her.
#4 Andrew on 2018-06-03 02:04 (Reply)
Kid needs life coaching and a cheerleader.
#5 Bird Dog on 2018-06-03 07:10 (Reply)
Back in the '70s they simply said kids like this "couldn't find themselves". Didn't have any like this myself, but a few boyfriends and girlfriends were afflicted.
#6 BillH on 2018-06-03 10:45 (Reply)
From what I've read at https://www.jqpublicblog.com/ , AF might not be a good choice.
#7 Sam L. on 2018-06-03 11:09 (Reply)
I assume she is white. I often wonder when I see students like this whether they are beaten down by how often the education establishment tells them that their ancestors were genocidal, slave-beating monsters. This generation seems to hear it a lot and I would bet that it affects some of them pretty deeply.
#8 Dangerous Dean on 2018-06-03 11:39 (Reply)
She is probably the output of a family who never allowed their overprotected children the freedom to wander about on their own, run, play outdoors, discover and fall down.
#9 sixtyville on 2018-06-03 13:08 (Reply)
That is a sad story; hopefully there is something that you can do to help her "snap out of it" and get a life going.

Without breaking dr/patient confidentiality, I do hope you can let us know how things turn out - as well as with other cases like hers.
#10 charles on 2018-06-03 16:11 (Reply)
Three words - Sweetheart, grow up.

Where should I send my bill?
#11 BlackDog on 2018-06-03 17:36 (Reply)
Because of the push for everyone to go to college many young people never realize they'd like to do something different from academia. A basic starter job would really do her good, just physically moving could change her life if all she's ever done was sit at a desk. See if she has interests that involve working with her hands, she may have untapped creativity in baking/culinary arts or as a florist for example. Obviously, the military is a quick answer but I wouldn't recommend it for this girl, it wouldn't be fair to the rest of the country.
#12 L.B. on 2018-06-03 20:37 (Reply)
I'm confused. You would be a good fit as (a) a therapist, (b) an employer, or (c) a dinner date?
#13 mike m on 2018-06-04 17:28 (Reply)

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