Robert F. Kennedy Jr., the noted drug addict, son of a once-famous left-wing politician, and amateur climatologist, predicts occasional bad weather until the next election, caused by Bush.
"We can expect hurricanes, tornadoes, thunderstorms, rain, and cloudy days, and hot, humid days this summer - all due to Bush's oil-friendly, anti-humanity, capitalist policies," he predicted. "Maybe even some windy days," he added.
"How many of our summer weekends in Hyannisport will be ruined by Bush?" Kennedy, who has no employment but reports his status as "personal investor" on his tax form, pointed out that bad weather is a growing concern among Americans, who are entitled to nice weekends in the Constitution and in Federalist Paper 73, in which Madison wrote "Do not let Bush ruin your weekends."
"Bush is the greatest threat to the environment since God in Noah's time," Kennedy said. "Just you watch. It will be getting warmer every day now. Soon everyone will be wearing shorts and bathing suits instead of skiing in Vail. The snow is melting, and every citizen in America is fleeing Vail. Where will all of those skiers of color go? Will they all end up in the New Orleans Superdome, starving and dying by the millions because of Bush, without their Valium and Prozac?"
"It is all Bush's fault, but the reporting on bad weather will end if we win the next elections", he asserted, as he returned from Vail and stepped off his water and solar-powered private jet at the Westchester, NY airport and climbed into his solar-powered limousine to return to his gated Westchester estate. An assembly of illegal Mexican and Ethiopian slaves were seen loading skis and bags into the trunk of his solar stretch-limo, as a number of menacing-looking bodyguards stood around morosely smoking unfiltered Camels, with their other hand resting ominously inside their jackets.
Image: Land's End global-warming swimwear, being modeled at the North Pole Four Seasons Resort and Spa.
