George Will with a summary of recent insanities: Thanks, or something. For example:
A U.S. Forest Service article on safe marshmallow toasting did not neglect to nag us: It suggested fruit rather than chocolate in s’mores.
Brilliant! Fruit is "healthier" than chocolate? Not true at all. Both are pure sugar. And I defy these idiots to tell me that a single forest fire was caused by a happy flaming marshmallow.
One of your betters in Washington with a degree in Marshmallow Studies was actually paid a good salary with excellent lifetime benefits out of your pocket to convey that advice. I recommend laughter and sarcastic derision. Suicide is out of the question but passive resistance might be a safe approach. Marshmallow afficiandos know that a marshmallow without a burnt crust is just garbage, as is a S'more without Hersheys.