We are a commune of inquiring, skeptical, politically centrist, capitalist, anglophile, traditionalist New England Yankee humans, humanoids, and animals with many interests beyond and above politics. Each of us has had a high-school education (or GED), but all had ADD so didn't pay attention very well, especially the dogs. Each one of us does "try my best to be just like I am," and none of us enjoys working for others, including for Maggie, from whom we receive neither a nickel nor a dime. Freedom from nags, cranks, government, do-gooders, control-freaks and idiots is all that we ask for.
Toddlers commonly swing their sippy cups in a motion resembling swinging a beer stein. So, I thought, it would be a fun and lucrative invention to market a baby beer stein sippy cup.
The mothers I talked to didn't think it near as much fun as did the fathers, and we all know who rules the high chair. The closest photo I could find of my idea was this one, for seniors. The one I had in mind would have been fancier.
As usual, mothers had it correct, if only because the joke might have been taken more seriously. This mother in Florida learned that lesson, the hard way, due to posting a photo on her facebook of her baby with a bong. The mother was arrested for possession of drug paraphernalia, not for child abuse.
In any event, if you want my invention, you're welcome to it.
Almost as offensive as drinking beer with a straw, but it would probably sell as a novelty anyway...I never understood why the insulated covers for beer (coozies??) were popular...I never had a beer open long enough to get warm before drinking it
“Great Historical Innovation In Carpet Industry”
This is Akbar vojdani Aghajani. I was awarded with the special prize in the 23rd international kharazmi Festival for my new and revolutionizing invention.
My great innovation can totally revolutionize the carpet industry which has a background of more than 2500 years.
In this significant innovation, all carpet knots are completely prepared in advance .this will:
1) Reduce the carpet weaving time to one third, because the weaving speed would increase by three times.
2) Create the possibility of using hundreds of various colors in one carpet.
3) Enable the weaver to use up to 4 different colors in one carpet knot.
4) Involve vast groups of people in carpet industry, since it does not need any specialized training.
5) Eliminate the possibility of making errors in carpet weaving because the worker is actually weaving an already totally prepared plot of the carpet.
6) Reduce the labour cost in carpet production to at least one third of the existing values.
Therefore the income of the weaver and the carpet owner will substantially increase.
7) Since the new innovation does not need much skill, it enables the person to weave the most sophisticated carpet patterns in the easiest manner.
8) Enable to weave the carpet exactly according to the given picture or painting, and the output is surprisingly quite real.
This was a brief explanation of the advantages of my new extraordinary innovation in carpet weaving. For more detailed information you can refer to my website at:
image ISESCO : http://www.irupload.ir/images/mhwmh8xqhzvjdwz7kjyh.jpg
image : http://naghshrizan-co.com/en_taghdirname.aspx
At this point I should declare my willingness to offer or submit a package consisting of my new innovation with all necessary scientific and technical details, to the esteemed Chinese carpet manufactures Or dealers.
In case you are willing to start negotiations on the above mentioned proposal, please contact me or my agent Mr Morteza Moeeny Afshary through.
Notice: it is evident all legal rights regarding this invention has
been reserved by the owner so far.
Akbar vojdani Aghajani