This silly thing is going around the email circuit, so I guess we can use it here:
"The good news is that I truly outdid myself this year with my Christmas decorations. The bad news is that I had to take them down after 2 days ... First, the cops advised me that my clever display would cause traffic accidents as they themselves almost wrecked when they first drove by. Secondly, an old lady grabbed the 75-pound ladder and almost killed herself by climbing to the top (she was not happy). She was one of many people who attempted to do that. My yard couldn't take it either. I have more than a few tire tracks where people literally drove into my yard."