We are a commune of inquiring, skeptical, politically centrist, capitalist, anglophile, traditionalist New England Yankee humans, humanoids, and animals with many interests beyond and above politics. Each of us has had a high-school education (or GED), but all had ADD so didn't pay attention very well, especially the dogs. Each one of us does "try my best to be just like I am," and none of us enjoys working for others, including for Maggie, from whom we receive neither a nickel nor a dime. Freedom from nags, cranks, government, do-gooders, control-freaks and idiots is all that we ask for.
We had a wisteria hell at one time. The neighbor asked me if I could do something about it. From his yard the wisteria was 15 feet high. It took four men three days to clear the lot. Talk about a loss of privacy.
I will never again have wisteria. It is beautiful in bloom and has a wondrous smell of springtime but I think I would rather have English ivy.
My 10th grade biology teacher brought a bunch of Wisteria blossoms to class and dipped it in pancake batter, fried it and served it to the students. It was different. Back in 1974, this was my introduction to the world of Euell Gibbons and "natural foods". Being from the South, I think anything fried is worth a try - but still I prefer meat, especially wild meat like venison.
I would rather have English ivy. Glad to send you some. I put a few sprigs on a small bare spot on a steep slope about 30 years ago, and now it covers many hundreds of square feet and tries to climb trees, shrubs, walls or anything else vertical, leaps across walkways; you name it.
They're beautiful, unless you have an odd one like I do that doesn't bloom. It sat in the middle of our yard for about 6 years without a single bloom. According to the local radio gardening expert, sometimes you just get one that does this. Then a couple years ago started blooming sparsely out of nowhere. Violently disturbing the roots with a shovel in late winter helps.
Bird Dog - I'm curious about whether you like the wisteria at all the times of the year it is not in bloom. Is it pretty and green? Does the vine constantly drop twigs and leaves down below creating a maintenance chore?
Mine runs up an old laundry line pole in the middle of the yard. I fastened a pole to this so the pole was a cross. The wisteria grew around it in a mushroom shape and makes for good shade to sit under with lots of foliage. Birds like it as a tall thicket.
The maintenance for me comes from trimming up the hanging branches every couple weeks because I like to walk under it. Pretty minor. Without trimming I think it would turn into a tall bush from the ground up. Also, runners can come up from a long way out. Not a problem if it's grass that gets mowed.